Sage-in-Training (my few words on our Maya Angelou)

Don't get mad. I think you might get a little mad, but I've got a truth to tell.

I didn't always love Maya Angelou's writing. 

It was just "okay" to me. 

I loved some other author's works much much more than hers.
I guess I liked make believe at the time more than I cared for a truthful story.
Spin me a tale, entertain me - that's what I wanted.
Maya didn't serve flowers. Just raw truth.

But I bought and read her books because as a proper English Major I am supposed to and they look good among the other authors of the black canon section on display in my well-loved and cherished bookcase. Don't judge me...

However,

I LOVED Maya. 

I LOVED Maya's presence. 

I loved loved loved the moment she opened her mouth to talk. (Even when her long thoughtful pauses kinda annoyed me cause it turns out I'm not terribly patient.)

Maya was:

So Calm.

So Regal.

So Wise.

So Patient. 

So Beautiful.  

So Dignified.

Every time I heard that woman talk, I instantly wanted to be the better me.  

The me I am always on my way to being.  

I have always thought I'd be a sage like her when I became older. 

Well I've gotten older, and am still a sometimes nervous, still a sometimes awkward, and still, most of the time, that say the wrong thing at all the wrong times kind of woman. 

Maybe next decade is when I'll be a sage.....

I was so sure that before long, I'd meet Maya and be invited over for tea, on her porch, in the summer - and she'd tell me everything I missed along the way on how to live in the world, a sage in training.  

If Oprah happened to come along, the more the merrier.  

Today's news though, seemed to say that its not going to happen. I'm in a bit of a shock.....

The life story and spirit of Maya reminds me that the future is wide open for any possibility I can imagine.
You know about her childhood, her young adulthood, the stuff she's been through, right? 

Well me too man, me too!  

This road of mine has had its twists and turns to the dark side and back and sometimes, I still look around to find myself on the long hard road heading in the exact opposite direction I intended.....

And sometimes I get stuck in the belief that I am my past.  

That I am the unjustified detour. 

That I don't deserve to be my greatest self. 

That everything God has to offer belongs to other people. 

Not to me. 

But when I have seen the face of Maya though,
and when I have heard the voice of Maya though,
I am always snapped back into the absolute truth. 

And that truth is that I too, 

Am beautiful,

Am wise, 

Am a Sage, (not in training, but an honest-to-God-Sage in my own way)

and 

I Can

and
I Have
and 

I Shall continue
to offer all of Me to the world 

with love and generosity, 

shameless and daring,  

knowing I am the Sage I've sought, 

on this road of mine.....

"My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry, to get my work done and to try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return."

Maya Angelou